Self-Reflection (Beginning of August Update)

August has begun, so I think it’s about time I go on an update on where I’ve been mentally, and what I hope for this last month. Im going to try my best to keep this coherent since I have a bad habit of making these things pretty unsorted when I don’t think thoroughly. I’m going to start with this thought, which I’m going to (loosely) try and answer by the end: I’m human. And a teenager, I need to accept both of those facts. So why exactly is it so hard for me to accept that?

WHERE I AM WORK-WISE 

It’s probably best if I start with concrete things, such as my reading goal, First of all, I unfortunately have to admit I didn’t finish WOBW, despite being close to the end. I think I just tuned it out because I started it when school was still in session. I might finish it one day, and I still have to say, it’s a great book. I also already finished the Unteachables. And just today, I finished AGGGTM, my Summer reading book. It was also spectacular mystery book, and Im glad I chose to read it for school. I’m also almost done with said assignment for that, so schoolwork in general can now be on the back burner…until the 26th.

I’m going to try and find one more book to read this summer- probably a shorter one (<250) since AGGGTM was nearly 400 pages long! (It took me a month.) If you have any suggestions please feel free to tell me.

ART FIGHT

That’s for school work. For personal work, like art and animation, here’s where I am. First of all, still no new laptop…might take this entire year for it, but I’m willing to wait. Also, Art Fight was great. I did run into some burnout in the end (and I’ll elaborate more on that later), but I was able to make 45 attacks, all I put great effort into. I also received around 35 defenses, all from talented artists and friends that I’m super grateful for. I obviously couldn’t do everything this year, but that is because I’m a teenager who works by himself. And hey, there’s always next year. I bet 17 year old me is going to be even better than me right now! In…a lot of aspects hopefully, not just art. 

MY GAME

I unfortunately can’t speak much about this one, because I haven’t announced it, but I have been adamantly working on this passion project for most of this summer, and I’m at a great point at it right now, and a good friend of mine is helping a lot. I am slowing down a bit on it right now- not for burnout, but to prevent burnout. After all, with a whole month of summer left, I don’t want to be doing the same thing every day on it. Now we can get into some more personal and subjective stuff relating to my mental status and some goals for myself.

I BEGAN OFF AUGUST PRETTY STUPID

Ok, before I can elaborate on that headline, you need to understand basically I let one of my biggest flaws take over again: my inability to shut my mouth and think things through. The thing is, I’m smart. I’m going to be blunt, I think of myself as smart. At least, book smart however. When it comes to emotional intelligence, things can go awry. I’m scared to admit that at times I can come across as impulsive or childish, but it’s true. I want to better regulate my emotions, by thinking things through and having a better sense of empathy. When I do think those things through, I can be emotionally mature and respectful. When I don’t and I let that immature side of me push through common sense, that’s when I mess up. I think this quality is more prominent online because I can forget these are real people, not just profile pictures. That’s an important lesson in general- online life is still life. And it should NOT take over my life.

Anyway, now that you know about that, I still need to explain that headline. What happened is that I said something pretty insensitive because of a petty detail only I would care about. I deleted the message once I was admonished for it, but I couldn’t help but reflect on that and think “Hm. Dumping all your angry feelings like that over petty things probably isn’t healthy for your emotional wellbeing.” So guess what I did? I ranted about my toxic traits to (REDACTED WEBSITE)…the exact same thing I was worrying about. If I’m being honest I don’t even fully remember what I posted even though it was like, 2 days ago, but it’s probably for the best I don’t because I remember feeling ashamed seeing the first comment on it, although I deserved it. I decided to log off, and I’ll probably delete that post in future for my dignity (although I am debating on if that’d be cowardly), but for now, I should forget that and instead focus on what else happened.

I remember after that I just had the most unhinged rant to my friends in (OTHER REDACTED WEBSITE) and after that, I realized again- maybe this dependency on others knowing my victim mentality isn’t healthy. So I decided to log off (ORD) as well. And now I’m making a commitment- I’m going to try and avoid (ORD) in general until Friday or Saturday. (For reference, I’m writing this on Monday, it’ll probably release on Tuesday) While I know it’s healthy to be emotionally vulnerable at times, I think during that meltdown I forgot it’s unhealthy to be emotionally vulnerable to the point you just embarrass yourself. In fact I think a while ago I gave my friend advice “the internet and anger usually don’t mix.” I really have to stop forgetting my own moral values.

MY GENERAL GOALS

Ok, venting over, what else do I want to do for my emotional and mental wellbeing? First of all, I want to loathe myself a lot less. Despite everything I just ranted about, I also remember if I don’t have faith in myself and continue my victim mentality, then I will get no where regardless, going against my want for self improvement. 

I remember in my rant I mistakenly said “I don’t think I can get rid of my toxic traits”- which…just SCREAMS fixed mindset. And I think I tricked myself into thinking I was showing a growth mindset because I also added “I can mitigate them”- which is true, but thinking I can’t rid them in general is just stupid. I wasn’t born with these traits. And I think mitigating them and getting rid of them are actually the same thing. We all inherently have traits like being selfish or hypocritical- but when we don’t indulge in them and instead focus on growing our positive traits, that mitigates them- almost making it seem like they aren’t there. Sure, they could pop up once in a while, but as long as it’s not a pattern and just honest mistakes, than that’s ok.

So what steps will I actually take to improve this and be more mindful? The most obvious one would be decreasing my internet time and using said time wisely. I feel like I should indulge myself into more positive or constructive content that helps me mentally, from YTbers like Psych2Go, Kiana Docherty, or . (Even maybe..Jonochrome. Kinda.) After all, if I hear more positivity, I’m more likely to spout more positivity, and decrease my chance of letting incidents like I mentioned earlier happening.

It also means I’ll be trying to watch less YT, and instead watch more stuff I can enjoy…I’ve been getting really into ATLA for instance, and I think at the rate I’m going I’ll be able to be partway through Chapter 2 by the end of Summer. This also ties back into what I said about taking a full break from that website. I want to be less dependent on social media in general, and appreciate the beauty of being by myself…and touching grass. 

For other things I plan on doing, I think I’m gonna remind myself to make more blog posts and journal more. After all, if I don’t find an outlet for my emotions in the first place, they’re just going to take over again. I will also try to talk to my friends more in general…my real friends, not just my online friends. I think I forgot what human interaction was and why we value it. 

I’m probably going to be seeking other sources to be more mindful of my surroundings and aware of my temperament. I want to indulge in more feelings of being proud and satisfied. No one wants to be bitter and ungrateful. This also ties into me trying to overthink less and stop being such a perfectionist when it comes to my work. Sometimes you just…have to do it, and accept what you can do and can’t do as long as it’s your best effort. If you force yourself to not accept that and just want more of yourself and others- you’ll never be satisified and downright miserable. I’m gonna remind myself that more…Take your time and enjoy yourself. Maybe I’ll write this down and place it on my wall!

PERSONALITY TEST

Yknow I talk a lot about emotions taking over in this post. This ties into something that happened shortly after that meltdown- I decided to retake the Myers Brigges personality test. For the longest time, it told me I was INTP-T. Like, since 7th grade. But my latest test…said I was INFP-T. Had I actually shifted my personality that much? Everything remained the same…except I went from prioritizing thinking to emotional reasoning. To be fair it was only by like, 3%, and I might’ve been biased in the moment, but I still find it interesting. And it’s probably why most of my issues do center around my emotional regulation in general. But that was an issue I had when I was an INTP to…I don’t know, I have to admit I don’t always have the answer. 

But I can accept that I was born me. I became me. And I need to accept me. Warts and all. I don’t have to let who I worry I could be dictate me. I keep telling myself I will be better, so it’s time I start taking proper steps to be better. Even small steps, like being thorough with my emotions and remembering to go outside can help me in the long run. It’s probably a good thing I get control of myself this August especially- because schools around the corner and I’m gonna need to remember who I am before I lose myself forever, and become the monster I never wanted to be.

CONCLUSION

This is getting long, so I think I’ll wrap it up here. I’m not expecting any advice (in fact I just shouldn’t expect a lot in general), but if you did bother to read through these angst thoughts all the way through, thank you. And as for that question I began with, the answer…is not obvious. I can only go so far to try and understand who I am, but I can go just as far trying to make sure who I am is the best I can be. Someone who aspires to make people happy, to be independent and live a happier, fulfilling life. In general, for you- keep on going, and be specific about where you want to go. Love you!

- Ninesevenpotatoes, 2026

(NOT) Brief Summer recap

I'm a week into July and I promised myself that I would do some more things this summer. One of which was more blog posts, so here's another quick one to hold myself over about what's happened so far.

First of all, still no new laptop yet. I'm writing this from the library computers. Woohoo. They only allow for 2 hours maximum per day, which actually is kind of good for me, because it helps me priortize my work I want to do on the computer. In specific, I'm working on a game that I won't reveal the name of right now, but I hope it'll be out by Fall of this year. (I say hope, not will.)

I've been wanting to read more this Summer as well. I still need to finish this indepedent reading book left over from 10th grade called Words on Bathroom Walls, which is about a boy, Adam, with schizophrenia who has to navigate his hallucinations, school life, an experimental drug, parental troubles, and a new love life with his classmate Maya.

Right now, I have two other books I'm reading. The first (which I actually just finished as of writing) is a middle-grade novel called The Unteachables, which is about a class of juvenile delinquents being taught by an apathetic teacher. Said delinquents struggle with dyslexia, anger issues, hyper fixations, and home issues. It took 15 days, and one day specifically I was able to read 80 pages in one session somehow. Normally I'm so fryed I can only read 15 - 25 pages in one session, but I was able to read for over an hour at that one time. I usually read 1 page in 2 minutes.

Last is my Summer reading book, the longest of them all- A Good Girl's Guide to Murder. The book is about a senior girl named Pip, who for her senior Capstone project, wants to shine light into a murder that has haunted the town 5 years ago, where a senior named Sal was accused of killing his girlfriend, Andie, and later died by suicide. I'm only about 60 pages in but there's a lot in it so far.

My goal is to finish these all of these books by the end of the summer. (The Summer reading book especially cuz..that's a grade.) Because of these books and my computer time, I've been going to the library nearly every day so far this summer, except on weekends. I walk 15 minutes to and from the library everyday, meaning I get nearly 30 minutes of exercise per day. That also ties in with how I would like to spend less time offline and more in the real world, even if I don't get to socialize much. 

Honestly, I'm starting to notice more of the toxic side of the internet. I won't go further into this day but I remember at some point during this July a former friend of mine just became some awful harasser and tried to spread rumors about my peers supporting pedophiles. I'm not going further into that but it is a good reminder: you never truly know the people you know online, and the people you do know are more than texts and pfps. They are real people with families, friends, and thoughts...like you and me.

I will say these last few days have been a bit more depressing for me for convoluted reasons, but I'll keep it brief: the heat wave and electricity issues at my house forced me to essentially live by myself in a hotel for three days. And I just found out this will only be resolved by next Monday, so this week has honestly just been pretty bitter. In fact, lemme just copy and paste a vent I said yesterday to allow myself to be emotionally vulnerable:

"As much as I like not having school, I kind of miss it solely on the basis I honestly had more stability than I do in my life right now. I don't want to explain furtger what depressing things in my life are happening but I will say

I genuinely miss having human interactions with friends even though I was already introverted. I don't feel comfortable talking with much of my family right now so it almost feels like I'm on my own. I can drown myself in my digital life as much as I want but at its core online friends aren't the same

Not to say I don't appreciate my online friends, it's just I want to see more than text sometimes. I've never felt so alone and stuck right now and only I can pick myself back up without truly opening whats bothering me. I feel like promises are getting constantly let down"

Lets move on to some more positive things to end off this blog post. First of all, like last year, I'm doing Art Fight, and I've been doing even better than last year. Right now, I've made 13 attacks, 2 friendly fire, and I've gotten 8 defenses myself. I'll probably make another blog post eventually about all my attacks. I love Art Fight because it's an opportunity for me to share my art and grow as an artist. 

It's also unintentionally reminding me of some key morals I should apply: first of all, I should count my blessings and be grateful of everything I have gotten so far instead of whining to myself about what I haven't gotten. After all, ungrateful people are unhappier, and I certainly would like to be less miserable. Art Fight is meant to be a fun, open place for everyone, and all the artists I see there are so talented and amicable. 

I also have to remember Art Fight is not meant to be competitive: I started out making 3 attacks per day, but that has slowed down a bit right now. Regardless, I shouldn't feel ashamed. It's not about making as many attacks as possible, it's about putting love and effort into the attacks I do make. After all, these attacks are meant to show how much I love all these other artists' characters. I do have a goal of at least 45 attacks by the end of the month, which is more than last year. 

Aside from Art Fight, I have also journaled a bit more this month, and I think it's helping me become more emotionally honest with myself. My anxiety and overthinking has been at an all time high, but I have to remember: it's better to be done then to be perfect.

Anyway, Art Fight out the way, lemme end this needlessly long blog post by sharing: I love VP Awesome and his down to Earth videos. I made a playlist of them for a reason. He's one of my favorite YTbers because he's honest about his struggles and I relate to them. Wheter it be learning to pick himself back up when life knocks him back down, trying to find the "little boy" version of himself when he was younger, or remembering to pursue what I want to do without giving up.

That's pretty much the lowdown of a lot of what's been going on. I remember I initally began writing this a week ago and it was titled "Brief June recap". I just added the "NOT" point when I realized this is probably longer than ANY single essay I wrote in 10th grade. Speaking of which, since I know my 9th grade teacher reads my blogs, lemme ask you: how's your summer?

Hope you enjoyed diving into some of the messed up mind of A.A here. Bye!

- ninesevenpotatoes, 2026

Quick update post

Wow, it's been a while, hasn't it?

Sorry I haven't posted a blog entry in a while, I've been hyperfocusing on personal projects, my art, and-...you heard it coming, school.

Specifically, this week, we have finals coming up, and one of my friends described them as "horrible and awful". Yep, that's pretty much it.

There is one silver lining though: once you finish the finals for the day, you can leave school EARLY! That's what I did in fact. Since I only had one final to do today, I left at 10!

I'm writing this on the library computer right now (still waiting for a new laptop...), and I just wanted to use the opportunity to update you.

I think part of the reason my blog posts came out slower is because A) again, lack of a laptop B) I began journaling more. I might try and get more blog posts out during the summer.

To end this off, lemme just mention: I've been 16 for a month, and I'm (not) looking forward to all the things that come with the mid point of my teen years.

See you later! 

- ninesevenpotatoes, 2026

Erica Green: Murdered 25 Years On This Day

Erica Michelle Marie Green (1997 - 2001)

WARNING: This post contains details relating to child abuse, murder, and decapitation. Viewer discretion advised!

A few blog posts ago, I discussed the disturbing case of St. Louis Jane Doe, a pre-teen Black girl whose decapitated body was found in a Missouri house. It's a rather haunting unsolved case to do this day. This is a case I mentioned with it as a comparison, as it also involved a decapitated Black girl found in Missouri.

Thankfully, unlike Precious Hope, this precious girl- aptly nicknamed Precious Doe, would eventually get justice. That girl would be Erica Michelle Marie Green. Today's case will be heavy, so only read if you have a strong stomach.

Before we begin, I would just like to mention that Erica Green was actually coincidentally born on May 15th (1997), which some of you may know is my birthday! Every time I celebrate my birthday, I will also celebrate Erica, knowing she should be celebrating it to, and she tragically won't be able to, due to the monsters we'll be talking about today. Let's get into it.

Erica's Life

As mentioned, Erica Green was born on May 15th, 1997, in McLoud, Oklahoma to her mother, Michelle Johnson, and father, Larry Green; she was the youngest of 9 children. At the time, Michelle was incarcerated, so already Erica had a tough start in life. Erica would soon be placed in foster care and be raised by her great-grandmother's friend, Betty Brown, in Oklahoma.

Like many toddlers, Erica was described as innocent and fun-loving, as she loves to dress up. Betty Brown also described her as self-reliant for a young girl.

Erica Green

However, on April 4th, 2001, things would soon go south for Erica again. Michelle was released from prison, and took her back to Kansas City, Missouri. At the time, Michelle had a new boyfriend, Harrell Johnson. Later reports from Johnson's cousins would say Erica had a miserable time living with her mom, and wanted to be return to Betty.

Both Harrell and Michelle were heavy drug users. Harrell was physically and verbally abusive towards Erica, and repeadtly beat her over minor accidents. What is even more abominable is that her mother didn't do much about the abuse. Eventually, this abuse would soon end poor Erica's life.

Erica's Death

One evening in late April (mere weeks before Erica's 4th birthday), Erica had refused to go to bed, her parents were enraged. Reportedly, Harrell was high at the time.

Her step-father then repeadtly beat her with an ashtray and kicked her, until she stopped responding. Once both he and Michelle realized what happened, they began to panic. They tried to revive her, and hours passed, but it was too late. Erica Green had passed. However, they weren't going to go to the police to report what they had done, and instead try and conceal their crime in a horrendous way.

Her step father used a pair of hedge clippers to behead her, and her "mother" assisted in disposing her daughter’s remains. Initally they tried to dispose of Erica near a church, but they decided on the woods as it would be harder to find the body.

Afterwards, Michelle would lie about what happened to Erica, claiming she went back to live with Betty Brown, and for years, Michelle and Harell would hide the truth of the girl's death. Soon enough however, Erica would be found...

Precious Doe

Kansas City, Missouri. On April 28th, 2001, police were searching for a missing elderly man and going through the woods. While conducting the search, one officer found something unexpected and gruesome. 

It was the headless body of a young Black girl, about 3 - 6 years old. Her cause of death was repeat blunt force trauma, done by being kicked and beaten with an ashtray found near the crime scene. She had signs of previous abuse and had been dead for at most a day. She also had a distinct birth-mark on her right shoulder.

News of the girl's murder was broadcasted, shocking and sickening many. A few days later, on May 1st, the victim's head was found not too far from the rest of her remains. It was wrapped in a plastic bag and was badly decomposed. Despite this, it still revealed the young girl had a fresh set of cornrows in her black hair. The murdered girl was nicknamed Precious Doe.

Reconstructions of Erica were produced in an attempt to identify her. Here are some of them:

NCMEC Reconstruction of Precious Doe (Erica Green)

Reconstruction by Frank Bender

Sketch

Identification

Eventually, with the help of Betty Brown (Erica's former caretaker) speaking up, and testimonies from Erica's step-fathers' cousin, Precious Doe was identified as Erica Green, and her "parents" were arrested for her murder.

On October 8, 2008, Harrell was sentenced to life for murdering Erica, and Michelle received 25 years in exchange for a plea deal. Erica has since been laid to rest in Missouri.

Ending Thoughts

This was a painful case to write about. I find child abuse to be one of the evilest things to do in the world, because children are so innocent and they haven't done anything that would warrant that. I don't get why Erica was returned to her mother and step-father when Betty was caring for her already.

The fact anyone could genuinely abuse and even decapitate a young girl is horrible to think about. What's also disgusting is how her excuse of a mother, Michelle, acted in all this. Michelle took her daughter away from someone she liked, and helped conceal her murder. How could you do that to your own daughter, someone you birthed, someone you should have loved? Personally, I think she also should have gotten life. 

Thankfully, with how dedicated forensic scientists were in this case, and Betty opening up about Erica, we were able to bring justice to Erica after her death. Despite what tragically happened to her, there were people who cared about this young girl, not her "parents". I hope they rot away in prison for the rest of their lives.

Sweet Erica, I hope you fly high. You looked very adorable and I think you could have grown up to be a lovely woman if you didn't get screwed over this early in life. I wish you a happy early birthday in Heaven!

Erica Green

SOURCES AND FURTHER READING

Cold Case Files

Paranormal Catalog

Unidentified Wiki

The Cinemaholic

Wikipedia

Find a Grave

- ninesevenpotatoes, 2026

So about yesterday…

ATTENTION EVERYONE! Read the following message very carefully for more context on what happened to me yesterday…cuz it was insane.

So yesterday, as I was on my way home from school, out of nowhere a robot came for me and all I remember after that is waking up in a decrepit cabin, bounded. What was worse is that the robot had taken my stuff and set up a weird attempt to impersonate me. It spouted some weird nonsense about how AI is going to take over and replace my identity as an artist, which sounded preposterous. When I saw what he had done to all my websites, I was so confused and perturbed, frankly.

But what really got me was the fact he was going to rebrand me as SIXSEVENTOMATOES! First of all, potatoes are better than tomatoes everyday. Secondly, you all know how much I DESPISE this 67 meme! IT NEEDS TO BE LEFT IN 2025! Eventually, when my robot replacement was distracted, I used a pencil to escape my capture, and then I subdued the robot before DESTROYING IT! I- I mean, permanently incapacitating it.

I got my stuff back and came back home today, so I’m making this update post to declare: I am not rebranding myself to that overly long username. It’s gonna stay Ninesevenpotatoes, for sure. A.A. is not A.I, and he will never be as he keeps growing as an artist. After all, the pen (or in this case, pencil) is mightier than the sword.

So yeah, expect some actual good art from me in the distant future. If you excuse me, I have to make something out of this scrap metal I now have.

- Ninesevenpotatoes, 2026

AN ANNOUCEMENT FOR APRIL

 

Hey everyone, I would like to give you all an announcement on a huge change. You all knew me once as Ninesevenpotatoes, a needlessly long username. I have posted my art online for a while now.

However, with times changing, I have decided to switch things up. I am now replacing myself with sixseventomatoes, a robot! Indeed, A.A. is now A.I. I know this change may be controversial to some of my long time friends, but I think it is a change you should get used to.

My artwork will be massively improved this year by replacing myself with a robot, and I changed my name to sixseven to truly embrace brainrot memes. Nine seven is actually a really lame number, anyway. 

Honestly, I think all of my artist friends should take note of me. AI is going to become the new art, after all. I am looking forward to this new chapter of my online career! Hope you all feel swell and well! Bye bye!

- sixseventomatoes, 20267

The Davis Family: The WORST FAMILY On Supernanny (Pt. 3)

[Foreword: Sorry this took a long while to get out, and I haven’t been posting as much as of late. Things behind the scene happened. Still hope you enjoy!]

Last time on the Davis Family saga, Supernanny tried to rescue a dysfunctional toxic family that was being ruined by a misogynistic, foul-mouthed father. And her results seemed...decent, actually.

But will these actually stick when we take a look at the family in the last act of the episode?...let's take a look.

PART 3: A.W.F.U.L. at His Behavior

That title stands for A Worrisome Fucking Ugly Look at his behavior. Ok, it's not entirely that, but...it's still awful. And you'll see why in a second.

So Supernanny return a week later- oh, wait,...she actually arrives earlier, 3 days later, not 7 days. She says she's worried that Phil's behavior could escalate. Which...is concerning, because it tells me she doesn't trust this family. But can we really blame her?

We learn the parents thoughts again: the mom is scared to watch (you shouldn't have to be scared to watch, Debbie), while the dad thinks he's made a good change. Hmmm....

Round 3 for the Davis Family reel!

Unexpected Improvement

Now isn't that nice?

So the video starts, and we actually see for once Phil has made some progress. Phil actually plays around with his daughters and talks with them. Finally, one hint of love between them! But again, keep in mind, this is him on his best behavior on camera, so who knows how long this will last, or how genuine it is.

This is what a (step)father and daughter relationship should be!

We then see a scene of Phil and Morgan, outside on the sidewalk, talking about Morgan's boyfriend. If that description gave you flashbacks to the AWFUL slut-shaming scene from earlier, I don't blame you.

Thankfully, this time, the conversation is actually constructive. We see Phil joking around with Morgan about Chris (her boyfriend), and not shaming her. It's genuinely a bit touching to watch, especially considering so far all we've seen is Phil bully her.

But...you might notice how this almost seems too good to be true. Has Phil really changed for the better or is this just temporary?