Yes, the title is hyperbole, but this is a blog, so I'm going to use hyperbole all I want.
So, junior year began, and I'm already stressed beyond belief, I'm not even gonna sugarcoat it. I mean, it's not like there is no hope- some of the classes are cool and there's some clubs I'm considering, but just, as a whole...it's so much at once, and I need to organize it all.
There's a good chance I might make a future post discussing how I've been trying to do that, but for now, I just want to make a quick rant post about this annoying software (some suspect even spyware) that has made using my Chromebook harder than it needs to be: GoGuardian.
Basically, GoGuardian is a software that is designed to stop students from using inappropriate websites or getting distracted on their school devices. Simple in concept, and one that is needed for student safety. However, I feel there's a stunning lack of control between what is "inappropriate" and actually "educational". Here's some of my experiences with websites GoGuardian has blocked (and why some are preposterous):
First of all, most game or "fun" websites are no longer available. Stuff like Scratch, Pixilart, and the ionic CoolMathGames are gone. And I'm not saying students should be playing these in class, but I feel kinda bad they get banned entirely. What if class ends early or a student wants to play outside of class?
That's another thing to bring up- Go Guardian works REGARDLESS if your using your Chromebook in school or at home. Which is a problem because at home, I theoretically SHOULD be able to use the websites, NO teacher is there to monitor to me! (Again, not saying I should, that's more of a self-control discussion, but still, GoGuardian limits how much students can use Chromebooks in and OUT of school.)
And this brings up my 3rd point, which is probably the one I'm most concerned with- the fact GoGuardian blocks websites I need to use for school, like educational websites. So far, I've seen BrainPOP, Mathisfun, and CoolMath are no longer available. (When I say "CoolMath", I mean the original website that taught algebra before the games came out.) These websites helped me with topic review, especially in math, but now I can't use them...even though BrainPOP is attached to CLEVER!
It also blocked websites teachers wanted me to go to. For example, in Forensics, I couldn't go on the website for our first assignment, where I would find the answer to my puzzle. Another example is in Spanish, there's this website they wanted me to use called Conjugemos, to study my verbs, and I couldn't use it outside of class. And in Journalism, for the first few weeks, Basecamp was blocked! The website my teacher and classmates have to use in order to work on our projects! You can't make this up!
This brings me to one last website GoGuardian has blocked, and the one that caught my attention the most-...YouTube. Yep, all those easy-to-access educational videos I need to watch? Can't. Calming studying music I can use after school? Can't. Even if I'm outside of school, just want to chill on my Chromebook after finishing my work? Can't. *sigh* YT man...I'll miss using it on my Chromebook.
I will say, at least most of these websites can be unblocked by the teacher when your in class. And as I implied, Basecamp would be unblocked completely by the technicians, so thankfully our projects are still in action!...Unthankfully, they still won't allow us to email students on our student accounts, so...*sigh* there will be some trials and tribulations this first month of school.
And hey, we need to consider GoGuardian only affects our CHROMEBOOKS. My phone is still in my pocket, and I can still use it...during lunch and after school. I should add, the new phone policy says if we're caught with our phone at any point during a class, it's taken away for the rest of the day. Not much I can argue about that since I have been trying to use my phone less regardless.
Still thoguh, GoGuardian is...something else, and as I put it earlier, it's making Chromebooks a bit harder to use now. But at least it is keeping students on tract and not distracted!...most of the time. I mean, only if the teacher is actually monitoring them...
So yeah, that's my little rant about GoGuardian, and if you have to deal with GoGuardian as well, tell me how you feel about it. This post was obviously hyperbole at times, but GoGuardian still can be a pet peeve, and I don't really know how effective it is. But I'll probably get used to it anyway. My school has introduced a lot of strange policies, like the late policy, but I have been getting used to them.
You've probably cheated in school at least once. Maybe just a quick glance at your tablemate's test, or a cheat sheet under the table. I'll admit I've done it once or twice before. Of coufse though, when it comes to the stakes of cheating, it's usually not that extreme.
What happens however when the stakes involve fake friends, gun violence, drug exchanges, PTSD flashbacks, and suicide?
Well...you get a 2000s Newgrounds trilogy series...The Classroom. One of the most insane (flash) game trilogies of all time.
The Classroom triology was created by Luksy or Luka, your typical crude game developer. I don't know his age, but I presume it was around 15 - 17 when he made this first game. I remember playing it on the family computer years ago, maybe like late 2010s, so I have a lot of nostalgia for it. But is it as good as I remember? Let's dive into it!
I'm a week into July and I promised myself that I would do some more things this summer. One of which was more blog posts, so here's another quick one to hold myself over about what's happened so far.
First of all, still no new laptop yet. I'm writing this from the library computers. Woohoo. They only allow for 2 hours maximum per day, which actually is kind of good for me, because it helps me priortize my work I want to do on the computer. In specific, I'm working on a game that I won't reveal the name of right now, but I hope it'll be out by Fall of this year. (I say hope, not will.)
I've been wanting to read more this Summer as well. I still need to finish this indepedent reading book left over from 10th grade called Words on Bathroom Walls, which is about a boy, Adam, with schizophrenia who has to navigate his hallucinations, school life, an experimental drug, parental troubles, and a new love life with his classmate Maya.
Right now, I have two other books I'm reading. The first (which I actually just finished as of writing) is a middle-grade novel called The Unteachables, which is about a class of juvenile delinquents being taught by an apathetic teacher. Said delinquents struggle with dyslexia, anger issues, hyper fixations, and home issues. It took 15 days, and one day specifically I was able to read 80 pages in one session somehow. Normally I'm so fryed I can only read 15 - 25 pages in one session, but I was able to read for over an hour at that one time. I usually read 1 page in 2 minutes.
Last is my Summer reading book, the longest of them all- A Good Girl's Guide to Murder. The book is about a senior girl named Pip, who for her senior Capstone project, wants to shine light into a murder that has haunted the town 5 years ago, where a senior named Sal was accused of killing his girlfriend, Andie, and later died by suicide. I'm only about 60 pages in but there's a lot in it so far.
My goal is to finish these all of these books by the end of the summer. (The Summer reading book especially cuz..that's a grade.) Because of these books and my computer time, I've been going to the library nearly every day so far this summer, except on weekends. I walk 15 minutes to and from the library everyday, meaning I get nearly 30 minutes of exercise per day. That also ties in with how I would like to spend less time offline and more in the real world, even if I don't get to socialize much.
Honestly, I'm starting to notice more of the toxic side of the internet. I won't go further into this day but I remember at some point during this July a former friend of mine just became some awful harasser and tried to spread rumors about my peers supporting pedophiles. I'm not going further into that but it is a good reminder: you never truly know the people you know online, and the people you do know are more than texts and pfps. They are real people with families, friends, and thoughts...like you and me.
I will say these last few days have been a bit more depressing for me for convoluted reasons, but I'll keep it brief: the heat wave and electricity issues at my house forced me to essentially live by myself in a hotel for three days. And I just found out this will only be resolved by next Monday, so this week has honestly just been pretty bitter. In fact, lemme just copy and paste a vent I said yesterday to allow myself to be emotionally vulnerable:
"As much as I like not having school, I kind of miss it solely on the basis I honestly had more stability than I do in my life right now. I don't want to explain furtger what depressing things in my life are happening but I will say
I genuinely miss having human interactions with friends even though I was already introverted. I don't feel comfortable talking with much of my family right now so it almost feels like I'm on my own. I can drown myself in my digital life as much as I want but at its core online friends aren't the same
Not to say I don't appreciate my online friends, it's just I want to see more than text sometimes. I've never felt so alone and stuck right now and only I can pick myself back up without truly opening whats bothering me. I feel like promises are getting constantly let down"
Lets move on to some more positive things to end off this blog post. First of all, like last year, I'm doing Art Fight, and I've been doing even better than last year. Right now, I've made 13 attacks, 2 friendly fire, and I've gotten 8 defenses myself. I'll probably make another blog post eventually about all my attacks. I love Art Fight because it's an opportunity for me to share my art and grow as an artist.
It's also unintentionally reminding me of some key morals I should apply: first of all, I should count my blessings and be grateful of everything I have gotten so far instead of whining to myself about what I haven't gotten. After all, ungrateful people are unhappier, and I certainly would like to be less miserable. Art Fight is meant to be a fun, open place for everyone, and all the artists I see there are so talented and amicable.
I also have to remember Art Fight is not meant to be competitive: I started out making 3 attacks per day, but that has slowed down a bit right now. Regardless, I shouldn't feel ashamed. It's not about making as many attacks as possible, it's about putting love and effort into the attacks I do make. After all, these attacks are meant to show how much I love all these other artists' characters. I do have a goal of at least 45 attacks by the end of the month, which is more than last year.
Aside from Art Fight, I have also journaled a bit more this month, and I think it's helping me become more emotionally honest with myself. My anxiety and overthinking has been at an all time high, but I have to remember: it's better to be done then to be perfect.
Anyway, Art Fight out the way, lemme end this needlessly long blog post by sharing: I love VP Awesome and his down to Earth videos. I made a playlist of them for a reason. He's one of my favorite YTbers because he's honest about his struggles and I relate to them. Wheter it be learning to pick himself back up when life knocks him back down, trying to find the "little boy" version of himself when he was younger, or remembering to pursue what I want to do without giving up.
That's pretty much the lowdown of a lot of what's been going on. I remember I initally began writing this a week ago and it was titled "Brief June recap". I just added the "NOT" point when I realized this is probably longer than ANY single essay I wrote in 10th grade. Speaking of which, since I know my 9th grade teacher reads my blogs, lemme ask you: how's your summer?
Hope you enjoyed diving into some of the messed up mind of A.A here. Bye!
You remember how in my Detention blog post I off-handedly mentioned:
"...considering I had done worse in the past. Y'know, like... punching a student. Yep. (Story for another day!)"
Turns out today is "another day". Why I chose today is because I actually vented about this story to my counselor today. It may be old, but I still find it a bit relevant and kind of a cringe funny, like all of my old stories. I'd just like to clarify: I don't find myself a "violent" person, but I do sometimes do impulsive things when I'm angry, and this story is an example of one.
Stalling aside, let me get into it.
Prologue
Let's set the scene: Early 2023. I often site 6th through 8th grade to the years where I was at my worst. I was insufferable, miserable, full of myself, bullied others, thought I was wise, bla bla bla basic overconfident middle school INTP behavior.
In particular I remember I was rude and often dismissive to my teachers, mostly my 7th grade Math and English teacher. They didn't deserve that, and I'm sorry. This story takes place in 7th grade specifically.
I'm not sure what lead up to this, but I remember angsty 12 year old me was feeling really bad in the middle of Math class. Maybe I was just in one of those moods. I was also bored by the lesson because- to brag, 12 year old me "knew everything" that year. (I didn't, but knew most, so I lied to myself).
For some reason, I then went to the bathroom and actually was tempted to skip class entirely, as I went to the end of the hallway instead of class. I'm not sure what my plan was, though. The math teacher caught me a few minutes afterwards and reported me back to class, as I spent the rest of the class in misery.
You notice how disconnected this story actually is? I don't know why I was upset, I don't know why I was tempted to skip class, I don't know at all. I really don't get me sometimes. But this leads up to the title.
Incident
Now, I mentioned I bullied others, but I myself was also bullied due to being a miserable, aloof smart aleck. It actually sounds like a toxic cycle when I think of it. I don't know which came first, but regardless, it was just obnoxious.
In this specific instance, I was sitting on a bench waiting for lunch, wallowing to myself. One of my classmates, we'll call him Kaden, began to taunt me by trying to push me off the bench. I remember him spouting something like "No one likes you, A.A". ...and that's when I snapped.
Soon enough, I decided to punch him back in the chest and walk away.
...and that was all.
...no, really, that's all. What, did you expect something more flashy? No, just angsty pre-teen punches one of his classmates because he was bullying him.
Now, if this was a fake story, I would've gone on all badass, and that kid would respect me from now on. But this is reality, so guess what happened instead?
Reprimand
As anger-induced that punch was, I also felt a bit guilty. That guilt quickly dialed up to 20 when during lunch, I was called into the dreaded Principal's Office.
Now, before we continue, I would just like to bring up...I find it VERY interesting how no one reported Kaden pushing me on the bench and verbally bullying me, but the moment I fought back, that's when it gets reported. Great job stopping bullying, school.
Anyway, moment I get into the Principal's Office, I begin bawling once I'm chastised for hurting Kaden. I was very remorseful and apologetic, not hoping for the worst. I specifically remember the principal even mentioning he had a " sore red mark" on his stomach, and me, in sobby tears, cried "tHat MaKes mE fEEl WoRSE!" Which...y'know, knowing I was even capable of such violence at 12 genuinely does make me regret the entire thing.
I remained crestfallen until Kaden and my middle school counselor arrived, and I began to explain further what happened. I remember the Principal looking at Kaden and wondering why he would tell me something like that, and Kaden admitted he did it mostly because others said stuff like that about me.
My counselor, as usual, was amazing though, as while I was obviously scolded for punching a student, she told Kaden at the same time not to trust in rumors and still respect me. I apologized at the end of it all, and came out feeling a bit better, if still angsty.
Epilogue
I remember coming home that day and my mom found out about the incident, but she wasn't too mad, just glad I wasn't in too much trouble. I also remember my brother came home that day, and when he found out about why I hit Kaden, he actually justified it! That's how older brothers be sometimes.
For any takeaways from this story: an obvious one is adolescents are stupid, but another obvious one is bullying can be a toxic cycle. I never want to hurt someone as violently as I did here, no matter how bad they made me feel. At the same time, verbal bullying is just as hurtful as physical bullying.
While I think some of low social status was my fault, justifying how others thought of me, at the same time, you don't tell someone "nobody likes you". Things like that can sting, just as bad as a punch.
Hope Kaden is doing ok nowadays. Thanks for reading my lil' story!
- ninesevenpotatoes, 2026
P.S. This was unintentional, but did you notice the initials of each section spell out "PIRE"?
[Excuse me for mild profanity used in the first few paragraphs of this story.]
Left to right: The suspect, Mr. R, me (15), Mrs. P, me (13)
I realize I don't talk often about my personal stories on my blog, probably because my memories are often embarrassing or ridiculous. However, I was re-watching the Sonya from Toastville episode "Breaking Bread" (underrated show btw), and the plot involved Sonya getting detention over a misunderstanding, which reminded me of THIS absurd story, involving a time I got a full-class detention. But before we can talk about that absurd story...
My First Two Detentions
I've gotten detention 3 times...all during 8th grade. I know that sounds like way more detentions than someone like I'd get, but it was because during my 8th grade year I was um-...how do I put this bluntly? A DUMBASS. By this point in my life my inferiority complex and grandiose sense of self-entitlement was starting to become...way more noticeable than I wanted it to be. And it bled through some of my 7th and 9th grade year as well, although 8th grade was MOST memorable...cuz it was my first real year as a teenager.
My first detention was over something surprisingly simple...I forgot to do my homework over the weekend. Yep. That's it. No flashy story, I just forgot to do it. I'm not sure why that warranted a detention, considering I had done worse in the past. Y'know, like... punching a student. Yep. (Story for another day!) But hey, there's a start for everything. Detention was actually very uneventful. Literally just one other student and I caught up with my homework.
The second time I got detention I think was more justifiable, mostly due to what would some call an "inappropriate reaction". One factor of my inferiority complex is always trying to one up or get mad at the other immature kids in my class who would act out and be goofballs. We all know those obnoxious students. Ironically, by doing so, I myself was an immature student. And many of my classmates who I hated I'm actually on good terms now, if you would believe it.
Anyway, one time where this really got problematic was when I was being a little bitch during the middle of math class and I think I wrote "fuck you" on one of the trouble-making student's desks, because they were annoying me. Hmm...I feel there's some deep irony going on here. Teacher got into the debacle, and whadya know, I got detention.
Again. It was very uneventful. I of course look back at that moment and cringe with how bad I handled the situation.
But wait...there's one more detention we have to talk about.
The Fire Cracker Incident
"Wait, what?!"
Hold your horses! Don't worry, I wasn't that stupid.
Ok, November 27th, 2023. It's 3rd period, Civics. Our teacher at the time, who I'll simply call Mr. R was getting tired of teaching about the Constitution, because a lot of students were distracted on the Nearpod and goofing around. Y'know, classic churlish middle school shenanigans.
Then things escalated when we heard-... a bang. Like, just a crack. A pop.
Kinda like a fire cracker or something. I'm not sure what it fully was, but it was loud and noticeable.
Obviously the entire class stopped when the disruption happened...and Mr. R lost it. I don't remember what he said, but all I know is that by the end, he said that if the person who didn't cause the crack confess, he would give the ENTIRE class detention.
EVERYONE FREAKED OUT.
Now, it was around 1:05 when this happened, some time before the end of the period. If the culprit didn't confess by then, everyone would be screwed. So, understandably, it turned into some sort of Among Us like investigation where everyone had eyes on each other, particularly around the table where it was found.
It was around this time that-...for some reason, 13-year-old me decided to start writing an email to my counselor that I keep referencing (who I'll refer to as Mrs. P). This email is still available, so I'll be taking some excerpts of it since it's actually pretty decent- and hey, who else to provide an accurate description of the incident than a literal victim at the exact time? *ahem*
In 13-Year-Old Me's Words
"It wasn't a broken pencil, it wasn't a book landing on the floor, it was POPPER. You know, those things at birthday parties and fireworks? So immediately the class went silent and Mr. R just went off on us, and then said that if the person who threw it didn't fess up, he'd give the WHOLE class detention. Initially, I thought he was joking since he's said this stuff before, but no, he legitimately was saying by the end of class if the person wasn't being a chicken (hey, his words not mine), we'd be in his class at 2:20 - 3:00. I was immediately horrified realized he was being for reals, and immediately panicked that someone's churlish out of pocket stupidity would lead to not only my 3rd detention but to everyone's else's after school plans being ruined. I bet this was a multitude of people's first detentions as well.
After that, everyone, and I mean EVERYONE turned on each other. There was yelling and frustrating [sic] shouting, people randomly pointing figures at each other. I was worried that this wouldn't even be in the school's conduct- I mean, you can't give 30 KIDS punishment for ONE KIDS actions. I actively recorded some of the drama in case the detention did get served. Of course, I didn't want Mr. R fired, but I did feel this was a power imbalance.
As the class silenced down, Mr. R redirected us to the next lesson, and I already completed most of it, so I uh, continued to panic as the clock approached 1:15. So...I wrote this ahead of time. Yeah, I haven't already been served detention yet, but I feel this story is so unnecessarily bizarre that I just have to write it down. Right now, there are 4 minutes of class, and he hasn't fully confirmed if we all have detention. Oh- it's 3 now. I better finish my assignments before I update you. If it's a false alarm, I'll still send it because it's kinda...kinda...honestly, I don't know. Grammarly says I sound concerned, assertive, and confident. :shrug: I'll just put a clarification at the beginning."
You know, I actually still write a lot like me from 2 years ago. Some things never change.
But what didn't change is the punishment. I would soon update the email before sending it. Take it again, 13-year-old me.
"1:20 - NOPE WE'RE ALL SCREWED. WE'RE ACTUALLY SCREWED. NO ONE CONFESSED. NO ONE.
Not all hope is lost though. We still have some evidence of who may done it, and if the person confesses during detention, we'll be let out EARLY. Unfortunately, it looks like that's not going to happen, so...uh...I'll reply just in case it does happen.
Anyway, gonna try and relax in math before suffering my fate. To be honest I was already sad and angry this morning because my terrible deadline skills meant I couldn't finish an assignment in time. But at least I would just get a lowered grade from that. NOT 40 MINUTES OF MY LIFE DOWN THE DRAIN."
Aw, rest in peace 13-year-old me. I do remember failing to finish that Health assignment...I'm still upset about that.
Anyway, one boring-math period later, and because the idiot who started this mess in the first place was still being cowardly, EVERYONE had to go to Mr. R's class. Let's see what I had to think about it.
The Erratic Email
"2:38 - Update...
HE WASN'T JOKING. I REPEAT: HE WAS NOT JOKING. I am actually in his classroom now when I could be home enjoying myself. (I mean, I'd actually be in the lobby, more on that later) I hope that person's happy. I hope they go home and feel ashamed of themselves. I know that sounds kinda cruel, but could you really feel happy for yourself in a situation like this?
This detention will probably be talked about for the rest of the week, as it's already been talked about a million times in the hallways alone. In fact, I hope this incident continues to be talked about because I just want JUSTICE and PUNISHMENT on whoever did this even though they've already been punished with everyone else, I think they deserve DOUBLE detention because think of it- not only did they cause a disruption in the class, their cowardness caused a whole class of children to basically be held hostage (again Mr. R's words), which probably caused their schedules to be disrupted."
Pfttt, 13-year-old me has the same overdramatic crash-out attitude as current me has. Again, some things never really change.
One good thing that never changed about me was looking at the situation from multiple angles, as well (although this will be more noticeable later):
"You know, Mr. R is being unnecessarily cruel, and I've probably written him to be the villain of this situation, but on some level, I understand. I just wish it didn't have to come to this. He recently said that we should tell our parents what happened, and that birthed an ethical dilemma: should I tell either one of my parents that Mr. R gave the entire class detention over a kid throwing a popper? What if they think it's my fault? What if they try and deal it up with the school? I REALLY don't want to start much more drama over this than I need to, but at the same time, as I said, I NEED JUSTICE. My day was already starting off bad and in a flash, I mean, bang, it nearly got ruined. I will make the most out of the rest of the day I have, and try to let this incident get past me."
Damn me, really about to have an existential crisis over a school detention. 13-year-old me may have been churlish but I did have good moments like this, and I was able to sympathize with Mr. R, even if I was being unfairly punished. Anyway, I then go on a bit of a tangent to my counselor:
"Tbh I don't even know why I sent this situation to you. What are you going to do, call the police? I guess what you can do is (assuming you read this) is tell me how YOU thought of the situation and my response. Was I overly dramatic or immature? Did I leave out details that might change the situation? Tell me anything."
Once again, even though 13-year-old me had frequent stupid moments, I'm glad I was able to ask for improvement strategies and had self-awareness. Making progress, me. Like always. Oh yeah, remember how earlier I said something about being in "the lobby"? Well...
"Wait! One last thing...so um, I kinda managed to actually SAVE myself from my mom's wrath because I fibbed. Ok ok calm down- what happened was that last time, I realized I only finished half of my assignment, and it was late by FOUR DAYS. I finished it and submitted it, but worried that I'd get a detention for it the next day. So I came up with a clever evil plan...I simply told my dad this morning that I'd "have an extra school project after school, at 3 pm". That way, if I got a detention, Dad would think I was just doing a project. Is it malicious? Yes. But is it smart? Yes. And I actually didn't get a detention for that, so I thought I'd simply have 40 minutes of freedom in the lobby...how painfully ironic. Anyways, I got some homework to do now..."
Hahaha, maybe I don't give 13-year-old me enough credit.
But anyway, the full-class detention arc ended surprisingly swiftly...
"WE ESCAPED!!! MR R LET US OUT AT 2:43 AND NOT 3!!!!!
I KNOW ITS ONLY 20 MINUTES BUT STILL! VICTORY I TELL YOU, VICTORY!
The mystery of who threw the cracker however remains unsolved. But I know for a fact I'll get justice one day..."
(Spoiler alert: I did NOT get justice one day.)
The Classroom Conspiracy (ft. Mrs. P)
So, yeah, that's the annoying story of how the infamously hated "one of you did it so I'm going to punish all of you" strategy gave everyone a detention. However, we're not done yet, as there was an epilogue with my counselor eventually responding to my rather unhinged email...
"Hi [A.B]
Wow, what a story! As you know, you're an excellent writer and I really felt like I was there. I'm glad you ended up getting out early, but I understand how frustrating it is to be kept after school for something you didn't do.
Do you have any suspects in mind? I don't know who's in your Civics class, but there have to be 'the usual suspects.' Do you know if Mr. R involved the principal?
I can't say it's good to lie to your parents, but 'little white lies' are necessary sometimes in life. Don't beat yourself up over it.
Thanks for sending me such a well-written email about the situation. Maybe we can try to find a few minutes to talk more about it tomorrow.
Hang in there. You're a wonderful young man & a wonderful student!! Don't ever forget that!
-Ms. P"
Can I just mention something I love about Mrs. P is that even when I'm clearly at my lowest (or most obnoxious), she still manages to show support and empathy for me? School guidance counselors for the win!
So then I of course replied with this long explanation of my intense theories about-...a very trivial incident, when I think of it in the long run. It's VERY intense, strap right in! (I will use M and J for suspects btw, and any time I say something new, I put it in brackets]
"Thanks Ms. P!
Here's the As to your Qs (stole from Odd1sOut):
"Do you have any suspects in mind?"
Yes, there is some suspects, mainly the clowny boys who always get yelled at our have to leave. [Look at that.]
I'll try not too look like I'm gossiping when I say the two main suspects named were M and J. Both were around the table where the popper wrapper was left (which was STILL there when I went to detention), but honestly I (PERSONALLY) think M is more suspicious because he managed to describe most of the incident in oddly accurate detail. He also wore red today- I'm kidding. [Why is there an Among Us reference? ...oh wait.]
But I DO know M is acting kinda weird. Even if he didn't do it, SURELY he witnessed what happened. In fact- that's another thing- there were apparently no witnesses. How? There were like 6 people surrounding the tables and NO ONE didn't snitch? Were they too scared to tell on them? Or were they a friend of who did it?
It's like a murder mystery. Huh...maybe I could write a horror story based on this where a group of adults will all go to jail after someone gets murd-...put to indefinite sleep but everyone's there. (I know that wouldn't happen in real life, but could a man create a wretched being that murders his brother, cousin, and mom?) [I'm referencing Frankenstein]"
You know, I'm actually kinda invested in this story now...even though I experienced it. I mean, there's conspiracy, there's theory, there's suspects, there's ethical dilemmas- THERE'S EVERYTHING!! Anyway, I adressed her question involving Mr. R and the principal:
"Yes, I think Mr. R is related to the principal. I quite literally saw the principal enter the room as everyone was complaining and stuff, whilst Mr. R stood by, and the principal moved on. So I guess the principal agreed for this? Or just didn't care? Woah woah I'm jumping for conclusions. I don't know man."
Now that I think of it, maybe my writing style is that I just write like I'm talking in real life. No one says "Woah, woah," when writing an email they'll eventually proofread. Anyway, we get this surprising moment of maturity, which references an act of immaturity from 7th grade (which literally begins with "Now that I think of it..."):
"Now that I think of it, the more I think of the situation the less I'm mad at Mr. R. I feel most people forget teachers are people to. And just put yourself in his shoes. You're trapped for 9 months with a group of rowdy obnoxious loud teenagers who constantly misbehave and annoy others. And you still have...uh...7 months to go.
Admitely, I do have my own opinions on my teachers. For example, I don't like how strict [the math teacher] is to our class. I've heard the statement "Ok, I am very disappointed with you" 15 times. That's not an exaggeration, it's probably 15 by now.
BUT, after the whole uh...[7th grade math teacher] fiasco where I was like "uGH yoUr faILng uR stOodEnts I wUz sO smOrt nO oNe pAssed" SHUT UP. SHUT UP 12 YEAR OLD ME.
You're- you're not smart. I mean, you're smart academically...but you still gotta learn stuff mentally. [Well Jesus Christ this got way too real!]
Anyway, as I said, I learned not to mess around and gossip around teachers and kinda keep my opinions UNLESS I'm actually concerned.
Oh. There were only two questions. Uh....now what? I guess I just gotta say that the last statement you said reminds me "Don't ever forget that!" is something my brain tends to forget. Like, I'm complimented by both my friends and my teachers like 4 times a week, and yet I'm still obsessing over the thing I did 2 months ago. It's a struggle, yes, but I will try and get past myself to stop overthinking and move on and grow. [Seriously, this is getting too real...]
Perhaps maybe I have such low confidence in my school performance is because GRAMMARLY IS POINTING OUT...how many mistakes? Wha- NINETEEN?! Oh- it's twenty three now. -_- (Note to self: delete Grammarly soon)
Anyways, see you hopefully tomorrow! I can't wait for our next meeting honestly, we haven't had one in A MONTH.
- A.A"
Of course though, because I'm 13, I still had to end the note on a somewhat immature note. You see for some reason I was sensitive to my counselor misspelling my name in my emails, so I got a bit heated at her in the end with an overdramatic comment.
"This is just to ironically point out how EVERYONE SPELLS MY NAME [A.B.] LIKE MY NAME IS SPELLED [A.A.A.] DO YOU THINK [A.B.] IS HOW I WRITE MY NAME??!"
IS IT ME OR DO I HAVE THIS WEIRD OBSESSION WITH SCREAMING IN MY WRITING??!?!
Also...chill, bro. It's a nickname.
Before my counselor sent one final email in that chain, I somewhat redeemed myself with this extra email:
"EXTRA!! EXTRA!! [Seriously, obsession with screaming.]
I also initially had a theory that maybe the cracker was released accidentally. And whilst it may have...the real question we need to solve is...why did a student have a fire popper in the first place?
'Yuh oh! We just had a birthday party in the middle of Science class, and I have an extra popper! I have no time to put in my locker. I guess I'll just bring it with me- [BANG!] ...oop.'"
You're getting there, 13-year-old me. My counselor sent me one last email:
"[A.A.]!!! (Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry. I never even thought about how [A.A.] would be spelled. It makes all the sense in the world that [A.A.] NOT [A.B.] would be the nickname/shortened form of [A.A.A.]. Hopefully I won't forget this.
Seriously, look, SHE'S apologizing and being empathetic after stupid 13-year-old me sent the most back-handed explanation ever. If that doesn't tell you what type of person she is, I don't know what that is. She is one of a kind. Which, by the way...thanks, for considering that, Mrs. P. I don't think I ever said thanks for that.
Your email made me laugh out loud (lol) in several places and you made a lot of really good points. I can't believe that no one has "given up" the culprit yet. It will happen soon enough if it hasn't already. Teenagers aren't very good at keeping things like that quiet.
I know, I can't believe we haven't met in an entire month!! We could always schedule time during one of your exploratories or maybe SEL/WIN if there's anything you'd like to touch base about. Just let me know. Keep on being the wonderful student & person you are!! See you tomorrow :)"
*sniff* She is amazing and more people should be like her.
Ending (of Sorts)
So, as I told you earlier, we sadly never did figure out which idiot started this whole mess in the first place. And we probably never will...or will we? Hmm...I know you're out there somewhere...FESS...UP. I'm kidding, I'm totally not petty over stuff like that!...totally...
Thankfully, I have never gotten a detention since. And I hope I don't again later on...but who knows.
I feel like there's a lot to take away from this rather funny in hindsight story:
First of all, teenagers are immature. Even if they think they aren't immature. I'm a victim of the Dunning-Krueger effect.
Secondly, teachers are human to, so if they seem crabby, try and sympathize with them.
Thirdly, guidance counselors are amazing and I absolutely would be a much worse person without people like them.
Fourthly, I'm still the same old A.A. as I've always been. Just changing, slowly, for the better.
Lastly, and this is the most important take-away you should have...
I've begun writing this blog post in July. I only escaped 9th grade about a month ago, yet I have to go back in a little less than 2 months. If you asked me to do freshman year over again or make me live in the woods for a day, I'm more willing to get devoured by bears then go through THAT heckhole again.
It's a good thing I'm smart (not to brag but I'm an all As...okay all As and one B student) or else I would've faced the reality of summer school, or worse- being held back. Having to do one extra year of school is one heck of a punishment, and if it didn't influence someone to become a better student, I don't know what would.
That being said, if I had to repeat one year of high school over repeating four years of high school, I'd obviously do the first. Thankfully, no one has ever had to repeat high school all over again!
...at least, until, this happened.
The Awful Alumni
"Student sent back to 9th Grade from 12th Grade"
Yep. You read that right. A student actually had to repeat four years of high school. FOUR YEARS of high school. After all that time, he got held back to the beginning. This is absolutely shocking and tragic.
By the time your out of high school, your about 17 or 18. Still a teen, but close to adulthood. It's where your life should begin- you start to consider career paths or colleges. But because of this, the student will have to spend the first four years of what should've been the beginning of his life...still in high school. He would be 21 or 22 when he gets out- and not even in college!
Of course though, as you learned in 1st grade, every effect in life (having to repeat high school) has at least one cause. How could this student flunk so bad he has to repeat high schoool? Many factors.
As you can already guess by the title, I'm going to discuss how EVERYONE in this situation failed. In specific:
The school system
The mother
Even the student himself
I suggest you watch the video for yourself first to get your own thoughts, then come back here when your ready to hear from me.
Have you done it? Let's go.
Faking the Grade
So immediately, before we begin, we can already make some assumptions...if a teenager was held back, it's usually due to poor academics. So obviously, this student probably wasn't doing well in school. And we find out how bad he was doing after we're introduced to the mother, Tiffany France. She has three children (including the student) and has to work three jobs. She is confident in knowing who failed him.
"He's stressed, and I am to. I don't know what to do for him! He's like 'Mom, what was all this for? What did I do this for?' Like, do he get a chance? Why would he need three more years in school? He didn't fail, the school failed him. The school failed at their job. They failed! (x3) He didn't deserve that."
And immediately, I definitely have to agree. The school where this incident occurred is Augusta Fells Savage Institute of Visual Arts, (a school in Baltimore, Maryland) which is actually surprisingly still open to this day. If a school had a student have to repeat the entirety of high school, I'm pretty sure it's closing immediately. There's still more people we have to blame later on, but we'll get that when we need to.
Anyway, it's obvious the school didn't give the child a chance for proper growth an education. It's the school's responsibility to make sure every student has a chance to graduate and prosper in life. So how could they let this student slip by the cracks? It's...interesting.
We finally get to see the grades of this student in question and- HOLY MOTHER POTATOES- WHAT THE HECK IS THIS?!
I bet if you placed a kindergartener in a high school class they'd still do better than this.
He only passed 3 out of 9 of his classes. A THIRD of his classes he passed. And even then, he did it just barely. Let's just observe this real quick.
The classes he got Fs were Algebra, American Government, Biology, Fine Arts Drama, SAT Prep (Math)-...he even failed PERSONAL FITNESS! It's the LOWEST grade here...my question is, how do you fail gym?! It's the one class that doesn't have any written exams, tests, or homework that you could screw up. Yes, there are running tests, but-...you can't fail them unless you went out of your way to not run. All you got to do is just participate and keep active in the class, and you get an EASY A. Even if your bad at sports, you shouldn't be able to fail gym. Here are a few explanations:
1) He's really inactive and doesn't participate all.
2) He doesn't dress properly with gym clothes
3) He ain't even bothering to come to class at all
I have a feeling #3 will be correct given the information I will tell you next. Anyway, he did manage to barely pass 3 classes, but they are still Ds in English and the Fundamentals of Art. Oh yeah, how do you fail art class to? Again, no tests. Even the most uncreative person could pass art.
His highest grade and the only good grade here is a B in Health Ed...and all I'm wondering is, why is that class in specific he passed? I don't even know how to answer that. It's just a random outlier. And in all, he only has...2.5 credits. Wow.
But anyway, just by seeing that report card, we can already get an idea this student does not show up to class or care about doing his schoolwork. He may as well not handed anything in. That part can be blamed on the student. However, we also have to ask...how did no one notice or care about him failing this badly? If I had grades like this, my counselor's probably scheduling a conference with my parents. Despite this, the mom only found out about this FEBRUARY of that year!
The video then explains that even though his grades were literally in heck, he still managed to be PROMOTED every year to higher classes. Why didn't the teachers tell anyone about this? Well, my favorite explanation is from someone who reacted to the video (link at the end) saying the teachers were just tired of his lazy, annoying behavior. Seems fitting.
Then they dig deeper into the son's records, and-
"In his first three years at Augusta Fells, he failed 22 classes, and was late or absent 272 times."
WHAT. THE. HECK.
And they said only his first three years! Imagine what happened in his senior year.
Strange School Statistics
Let's do some math to understand how awful this actually is:
We see for this year he had 9 classes. Let's assume he had that many each year. 9 times 3 is 27, so he would've had about 27 classes. He failed 22. 22/27 = 0.8148, or about 81%. He failed about fourth-fifthsof classes in his first three years of high school! That is UNBELIEVABLE!
Now let's address the absences and late days. While there's obviously a difference between not coming at all and missing some of class, we're going to merge them in a similar category. After some quick research, I found out there are about 180 days in a Maryland school year, not counting weekends or most holidays.
I did some estimation and I think there would be about 40 - 70 of those school days dedicated to weekends or holidays. We're going to say about 130 days your actually in school. Multiply by that 3, and 9th - 11th grade would be about 390 days. 272/390 = 0.697, or about 70%. He missed nearly two-thirdsof classes in his first three years of high school! This is UNACCEPTABLE!
At that point, I'm surprised he didn't just drop out. He practically failed nearly 75% of school in general and actually expected to graduate. I don't know what else to say, he's screwed! And apparently, there was one conference planned by a teacher, but the mom didn't find out, so the student just carried out.
So anyway, with the knowledge this student will have to repeat 4 years of high school, has only 2.5 credits, failed 22 classes, and didn't even attend said classes 272 times...what do you think could top this?
THIS.
This is what tops all. His GPA is 0.1373- which is already astonishing. But then you look at...his class rank.
Out of 120 students...he ranked nearly halfway, at 62.
I want you to pause for a second and actually consider how abominable that is. If he ranks #62...what are the grades of the 58 students BELOW him?! His GPA is 0.1373!! There are also 61 students above him, which do have better grades than him...but how better? How many students have at most a GPA of 1 in this school?!
And the fact that 58 students are actually somehow doing worse than him demonstrates that it's not just this student who slipped through the cracks. Half of this school is failing. What kind of high school is this with a pass rate less than a half? How is the school still open after this?
The Blame Game (pt. 1)
So we've already made it very obvious it's the student and faculty's fault this has happened. The school clearly did not make much of an effort to keep his grades up to date or refer to him to say, summer school. At the same time, the student himself clearly did not put much effort into his studies. The fact he's almost perpetually absent shows he didn't care to go to class or do his work.
However, we also have to consider there's sadly many reasons students won't work besides laziness. Sometimes bullying, mental disorders, living situations, or learning disabilities can decrease a student's drive to attend school. I wonder if this student had any undiagnosed condition that may have hindered his ability do work.
There is one more person however who shares the blame for letting this student's grades get so bad...I wonder who it could be...
"He's a good kid! Like he didn't deserve that- where is the mentors, where is the help for him? I hate that this is happening to my child!"
Yep. Mom. Where are the mentors? Where is HE?! He's not GOING to class in the first place! He's not going to get a chance to get help unless he actually goes to class. And excuse me ma'am, I understand being mad at the school- they should've helped you. But at the same time, I find it ridiculous YOU didn't know anything about his poor academics. Did you not get any report cards? I didn't actually get report cards for my 9th grade year (for some reason), but that doesn't mean you wouldn't not know about his grades at all. Nowadays you can easily check online your child's grades, which my mom does frequently. You clearly didn't.
The Official's Opinions
We'll get back to my opinion on the mom later, but let's resume the video, where a city school administrator explains what he thinks of the situation. With a very weird voice filter on him that makes him sound like Darth Vader because he doesn't want to be identified in fear of retaliation. A part of me finds this scummy considering your in charge in making sure things like this don't happen in the first place, let you casually did. Then again, I do know people go crazy and genuinely harass others over things like this, so I guess I can't be too upset.
Anyway, CSA has based opinions on the incident. "We see on the news the crime that occurs, the murders, the shootings; we know there are high levels of poverty in Baltimore...things like this are adding to it." And yeah, most students who don't end up having a chance at an education and growing up in healthy environments like this will end up in terrible situations like this when they're older. The CSA also said he would personally apologize to the mom. I appreciate the sincerity, but apologies mean little when a student has to repeat the entirety of high school.
"Dr. Sonia Santelesis was school CEO four years ago, when France's son was a freshman," She refused to be interviewed, but she did send an interesting statement explaining what should have happened when a student is flunking or persistently absent.
Apparently, at the end of the school year, letters are sent to the students about their academic status, and they can find it in the Campus Portal...right, because if I'm hypothetically the student in this case who is NOT going to class in the first place, I'm totally going to this "Campus Portal" and telling my mother about improving my education.
...I'm pretty sure this would be more effective if it was sent to a family member. It also said that a call should be made to the home when a student is absent in class, and they were willing to conduct home visits when the student wouldn't show up- which is a good system. However, Tiffany France claims NONE of this happened, indicating the system wasn't held up.
Also, we still need to adress the other problems that led to this- why could he move up grades if he was failing? How is ranked 62 out of 120 students, and what does that mean for all the students below him? This sounds like a very poorly structured school. The letter does say they will "review actions that impacted student outcomes." In other words, they didn't care to make sure students were succeeding unitl it was already too late for one of them. 10/10 system, American school system.
The Blame Game (pt. 2)
Anyway, the mom shows up again, and says:
"It really took a lot to just build up the courage to do this, like... [...] And he feels embarrassed, like he feels like a failure, and I'm like- you can't feel like that. You have to be strong. You have to keep fighting. He's willing, he's trying, but where would he turn to when the people that's supposed to help him is not (there)?"
Listen here mom. I understand being distraught by your son's failure, but...the school system did not give birth to him. You chose to have three children and needed three jobs, but that doesn't mean knowing about your son's education is a last priority. He was struggling and you failed to notice that. It's not just the school's fault. And your giving him the mindset that it was only the school's fault- not any personal responsibility on him or you. As sad is this situation, he should feel embarrassed, and take responsibility for messing up this badly. He can channel his negative emotions to improving. If he's not going to class, he's already not going to have the opportunity to get help from the people you say weren't there. For all we know they may have been there but he didn't realize it.
Yes, life is about fighting, being willing, trying your best...but he wasn't. He didn't fight to keep his grades up. He wasn't willing to go class. He didn't try to do his work. He didn't care, and his grades reflect that. So now you want to pretend he's willing to do all this when the damage has already been done? This type of mindset might give him the false (and toxic) illusion it's not his fault when he fails. When you mess up, confront that setback. Don't just blame others for it. Blame yourself, in a healthy manner of course.
I understand it's easy to push all the blame on the school for not doing their job properly and making sure this student has a great education- and it's true. It is the school's fault. But if we only blame them, we're going to the miss the other people at fault: the student and his mom. The mom clearly didn't do anything to help her son in school, which is how it got this bad. And the student himself did not bother. He doesn't care. He just thought he could dilly dally his way through school and actually graduate. Now that he's facing the consequences (which I imagine he never did in the first place), he's screwed up.
It's Everyone's Fault
So, we've gone through the entire story of this student's flunking. Who exactly is to blame here?
You already know the answer.
First of all, it's the student's fault, because:
He didn't care to show up to class on time
He didn't care to improve his grades or ask for help
He didn't care to participate in classes and do work
He literally thought he could just graduate by doing nothing
Remember how earlier he told his mom, "Mom, what was all this for? What did I do this for?" Excuse me, weren't you absent or late 272 times and failed 22 classes? What do you mean "all"? You did nothing, and as a result, your graduation was nothing. Assuming he looked at his grades, did he actually think he could just waltz out of school with...those grades?!
It would be one thing if there was at least evidence he tried to pass in his work or participated, but his persistence absences and failing even easy classes like gym tells me he doesn't care much about school, and doesn't have a good word ethic.
I did mention that I felt the student may have more going on, like a learning disability or something at home. I think there should be more investigated on his homelife and relationships if the situation got this bad. I remember most bad kids from my school hung out with each other, so he may have been influenced by his other poorly educated peers. (I bet those friends were ranked even lower than him)
Secondly, it's the mother's fault, because:
She didn't help her son with his work and promote responsible study habits
She's defending her son as if it wasn't his fault at all
She had children but wasn't bothered to check on her son's academics
Something just comes across as frustrating how much the mom tries to only blame the school and pretend she wasn't the one who gave birth to him in the first place. It's your job as parents to make sure your child has the best education, and even if the system was broken, you neglected to notice or care about your son's academics.
I do understand she was busy with her 3 jobs and other children, but that doesn't mean what your child is up to should take the back burner. I'm not saying to be obsessive about your child's personal life, but just checking in once and a while might stop problems like self-harm, drug abuse, or in this case- missing school.
Lastly, it's the school's fault, because:
They failed to look into his absenteeism
They promoted him despite him failing classes
They didn't address his flunking to his mom
They lacked resources available to help him
Your a school. Your job is to make sure no child is left behind, has a great education, and is motivated to be a someobody in the real world. Little to no efforts were made discerning his bad behavior. In my school, if your chronically late or absent, your grade drops to a D automatically, which would be very noticeable and alarming. I also remember sometimes during the year I would be late a lot, and my mom was sent an EMAIL so she could discuss it with me. This helped me be more punctual. For all I know, nothing happened when he was late or absent. No one asked where he was.
I also can't believe that despite him failing literally two thirds of his classes, his teachers batted an eye and let him move onto the next grade. Highly negligent and careless of them to do that. If I was a teacher and noticed consistent behavioral problems with a student, I would probably schedule a conference with the parent. One teacher did try that, but for some reason it didn't get through. Either the mom didn't bother to read her email or the teacher didn't properly send it.
I wonder if there were any mentors, tutors, or counselors in this school. These types of people exist to promote emotional growth in students for a reason. I began going to counseling sometime in 3rd grade, and look at me now!...Well, I'm not perfect, but at least my GPA is greater than 4, not less than 1! I bet without people like that in my life I would be in a much worse mental state right now. (Shoutout to all my counselors btw) I feel like if this student had the chance to meet someone like that, he could have been saved.
EVERYONE in this situation failed, which is how this unfortunate teenager ended up in such a tragic, stupid, and just preventable predicament.
Overall Thoughts
Our story does have a bit of a bittersweet ending to it. Tiffany Frances took her son out of Augusta Fells and he was enrolled in an accelerated school program in another high school. The news reporter said "if he works hard, he could graduate by 2023". It's 2025 now, so hopefully he was able to graduate and he's gotten his life back on track. I mean, if being held back by 4 years wasn't a wake up call enough, I think my grades being so bad they end up on the NEWS would certainly be one.
Still though, this entire situation demonstrates how easy it is for students to slip into the cracks and end up flunking or dropping out. I think we should look at this incident to prevent something as absurd as it happening again.
So, here's my advice to all the parties I mentioned:
If you're a student:
Attend your classes and try and be on time
Seek help if you need it
DO YOUR FREAKING WORK
You've been given the important opportunity to grow as a person and develop good habits for the future. If you don't care, you're early adulthood will be unstable.
If you're a parent:
Pay attention to your child's behavior and academics, don't let it slide
Teach your child it's okay to get things wrong, but to always try their best
Make sure you know what's happening at school
You gave birth to your child, so its your responsibility to raise them.
If you're a school:
Don't let students get this bad, and address the problem once it's noticed
Make sure resources such as counselors are available for students like this
Consider closing down if a student with a GPA of 0.13 IS RANKED #62 OF 120!!!
I still refuse to believe that half of this school has a GPA of 0.13 of lower. Someone has to be in the negative at that point. And if #62 ends up having to repeat the entirety of high school, my question is...what do you think happened to student #120?
...I don't even wanna think about it.
I actually read on the Augusta Fells Wikipedia page that one year, only four seniors graduated. First of all, that must've been a very lonely graduation. Secondly, if only four out of 120 seniors had the grades to graduate...this school has about a 3% pass rate.
Note to self: Never enroll my future child in Augusta Fells.
