End of 2025 Reflection

"It's not over. It's just beginning! [...] As long as you remember all the terrific things you did the past year honey, you didn't miss a thing. That's what New Years Eve is really about!"

 - Grandma Thora, "Arthur's New Year's Eve"

DISCLAIMER: This might not be the most developed, sorted, or even coherent, but I will promise it'll be written from an honest perspective. It's more or less going to be a more filtered diary-entry. Yes, I have a diary. I'll talk about that later.

Welp. 2025 has at last come to a close. It seems this year has gone by so fast and so slow at the same time.

I'm not gonna sugarcoat it. 2025 was one of the most turbulent, angsty years of my life...mostly in the latter half. It could be somewhere between 2022 (the year I found out what it means to be an asshole) and 2024 (the year I finally started high school). Why exactly? Well...y'know...actually, you don't know. Lemme just dump as much as I can.

[UNSORTED ANGSTY TEEN OPINIONS]

As always, it was a year of self-discovery and self-growth, but I also felt this year felt...bloated. Like, a lot more convoluted then last year, or the year before. And it makes sense, given that I'm expanding what I'm doing and I'm in 10th grade now. Next year, in fact, I'll be in 11th grade, closer to graduating.

Speaking of which, high school has been truly feeling like high school now. 9th grade was pretty average, but now, I'm struggling a lot more with the workload, which is disorienting my mind. I've participated in more clubs, which I guess is cool. Math is my best subject, but I hate factoring. Science is my favorite subject, but stoichiometry can suck a HORSE CO-

I also read possibly my favorite book in English, being Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson. It really resonated with me and I might make a future post discussing why I loved it. Speaking of speaking, I felt this sophomore year I was a bit more vocal and confident than usual. I was able to get out of my shell more, but I'm still staying in it for a while.

The same applies for my online life; as you know, I did Art Fight this year, and I loved it. I met new friends, and in imitated some of my art style evolution and influenced me to share more of my art online. I feel my art style got so much better this year, and I'm glad I'm being recognized for it. Of course though, sometimes what I draw does drive me insane. (P.S. My mom gave me a sketchbook this year. Thank you.)

If I'm being honest, I don't actually know at all what I'm going to be doing with my life. I think this year was when it really started to dawn on me how close I am to adulthood. I'm considering college, but I don't know if I'm ready for it. I kind of wish I was.

In fact, I'm not ready for a lot of things. If there's something I learned this year, it's that the hardest step is always the first one. I remember during my 9th grade year, my main goal was to "take the initiative", and I was able to take some small steps. I even made a new friend this year. I'm planning on hopefully applying that even more this sophomore year, even though I'm admittedly drained.

I got humbled a LOT this year by the way. Mainly online. Sometimes I feel bad for the fact everyone has to deal with me, for as much as I complain to myself about dealing withing everything.

If I'm being honest (again), I don't have the best self-esteem. I have trouble feeling proud or accepting people liking me because the one person I can't trust is myself. I feel like more people dislike me than I feel there are...when in reality, there's probably less people that dislike me more than I feel there are.

...right?

There are people who accept me, but I don't know how to accept myself, if I'm perfectly honest. I always wish to change, but I just feel bounded and dejected whenever I inevitably mess up. I want to learn. I want to be more open with others. I don't know how I can do that. 

It's like I have this weird preoccupation with searching for what I don't like about myself, and what I don't like about my life. I don't like that mindset. I wish I could be more grateful, more accepting, more- no, less blunt. I remember my English teacher has called me "brutally honest", which I'm only half-proud of. I want to be truthful, but I don't like to be shamed, or to hurt others. And that's happened multiple times this year. Maybe instead of being "brutally honest", I should aim to be..."gently honest".

Is that possible?

I'm not into resolutions. But I will outline that next year, I hope to be a lot more willful and lock in with what I want to do. I can't do everything, after all. I have to take it step by step. I also want to be more open and outdoor, as it could help clear my busy mind.

WAIT!

Before we close off for real...I wonder, what did 14 year old me have to say to me? I made this letter to myself about a year ago on a YT short.

[ahem]

"Dear A.A.

I don't know when you'll re-read this, if you'll re-read this, or if you'll like re-reading this, but I do have to say this. I understand that at this moment your life may not be ideal. You're struggling with your emotional stability, barely can get out of your comfort zone, and are hard on yourself. Not to mention you also have inconsistent priorities and are scared of what's happening in the world right now. It may seem like there's not much you can do. But please remember and understand that just because it's not going well right now never means it's not going to go well at all. Your at the core time of your life- an adolescent freshman who's constantly learning more about himself and others. It's easy to shame yourself because of stuff you mess up now, and I agree- it's terrifying to think about the future. We can't change the past, so that's anxiety inducing- but we can change the future, so that's also anxiety inducing. Take a moment and just think about where you are now, who you used to be, and who you CAN be.

It's so easy to get into a vicious cycle of stress and feeling alone- that you're failing everyone around you. But I promise you, there are people who care about you. You can care about yourself. You can care for others. Focus on your strengths, and keep up what you're good at. All the amazing things you can and have done reveal your true character. The person you definitely want to be. What matters most about adolescence isn't achieving greatness in the end- it's becoming a better person and developing your character. And each week, month, season, you improve yourself in small progress. Each year you try hard- and as much as you do that, you still mess up frequently. That's ok. Take what you screw up not to self-hate yourself- but a reminder your imperfect, and can still improve yourself. You will make it by the end of high school. You will make it by your 20s. You will make it during the rest of your life. Keep trying your best, and help- not only others, but yourself.

Sincerely,

A.A."

*sniff*

...thank you. (Er-...me.)

Closing Off

I know this isn't really a proper "conclusion" to this post. All of the issues I've written are still with me.

I am still lost. I am confused, maybe even an idiot at times. I can be smart, I can be proud, I can be loud and ashamed. I'm on my way to adulthood, finding who I am. I can hurt, or be hurt. I am somebody. Sometimes I can be a nobody. Maybe I need help. Maybe...maybe- no, I don't know what I'm saying. I don't know if this will be forever.

But... I will always be me...so it's bittersweet. I'm glad it's that. Because in reality, for as long as I live, my story will not have an end for a while.

Hopefully, a long while.

I don't have anything clever or inspirational to really end this with. And that's ok. All I have to simply have to say is... Thank you all so much. See you next year.

- ninesevenpotatoes, 2025...for one last time

Alyce Peterson: The Weirdest Doe Story I've Heard

WARNING: This post involves details of corpse mutilation. Viewer discretion advised!

Undated image of Alyce Peterson (1909 - 2001)

Another Doe has been identified this year, which always brings me a bittersweet joy. However, upon reading the details on this Doe before their death, it actually astonished and kind of disturbed me. And it will perturb you to, once you hear about it.

Today's post is about Alyce Catharnia Peterson (née: Philen), an elderly women who-...well, she actually died naturally, and had family who knew of her...but became a Doe anyway. How? Let me let you in on it.

Decedent Background

Alyce Philen (Peterson upon marriage) was born in 1909 and lived in South Dokata for most of her life. She later moved to Stillwater, Minnesota. She lived a long 92 years before her untimely death on July 23rd, 2001...of natural causes, keep that in mind. In specific, she died at Regions Hospital, St. Paul Minnesota. Her cause of death was an aortic aneurysm. This was on her death certificate.

Alyce was going to be cremated for her family. This was scheduled to be done two days later, in Forest Lawn Cemetery in Maplewood, Minnesota.

Her body was scheduled to be cremated at Forest Lawn Cemetery in Maplewood, Minnesota, two days later. The crematorium later gave her family her cremated remains.

At least...they thought so.

St. Croix County Jane Doe

Crime scene

On October 21st, 2002, a group of hiking boy scouts were walking in a wooded path of Houlton, Wisconsin, when they came across a rather unfortunate sight. It was someone's skull inside of a plastic bag in a garbage pail.

A cause of death couldn't be determined, and there was no trauma, but it appeared the decedent had been beheaded using a hand saw. Suspicious and disturbing. She had been dead for around a year.

The skull belonged to a woman, estimated to be middle aged or elderly, 35 - 60 years to be specific. Initially, it was also thought she was Asian or Native American.

She had mousy brown hair, and other unique characteristics included wide-set eyes, a pronounced forehead, flat nose, and no teeth. It was also thought she may have had a mental disability.

Original reconstructions, depicting her with Asian / Aboriginal features

DNA Doe Project

The case went under the radar until 2022, about 20 years later, when the well-known DNA Doe Project began working on the case. Their testing would prove more things about the decedent.

First of all, it was thought the victim was more likely of White ancestry as opposed to Asian or Indigenous ancestry. It was also believed her family may have had ties to Twin Cities in Minnesota, possible immigrants. Further testing would prove something surprising: the decedent may have been of Swedish heritage as well.

Up-to-date Carl Koppelman reconstruction

This surprise would help narrow down the search for this woman's identity. In specific, a woman from Stockholm, who's DNA matched the decedent, meaning she may have been a cousin. Researches then built her family tree based on that, which proved convoluted as there were no missing people in her family.

However, the search wouldn't end. Further testing would find the great great grand-uncle of the match, who moved to the USA in 1890s, and- married a Swedish immigrant in 1902. They had 7 children. Eventually, it was limited to one of these children for the victim: Alyce Philen.

Even though she was much older the age estimate, DNA testing was still an option, as Alyce had living nieces. Ultimately, the nieces would match 25% of the genetic information of the decedent, prompting further testing. And soon enough, this month, it was confirmed: 

Alyce Peterson was St. Croix County Jane Doe.

Identified (But Still Open)

The identification was amazing, bringing another poor woman her name back. It was also a bit surprisng; as I mentioned, she was WAY older than what was once thought; nearly 100, yet her estimates put her around middle age or early elderly years. 

Of course though, knowing she was identified only made the case more disturbing. Because, well, as I mentioned, she had died naturally, was thought to be cremated, and had her remains given to her family. 

So... how the HELL did her decapitated skull end up discarded in a trash bin in Wisconsin?!? And did the family ACTUALLY have her remains for all this time?!?

Things like this is what made this case weirdly disturbing to me. We don't have any answers yet, but I hope we do soon. I feel like something happened behind the scenes of her "cremation" that resulted in her skull being found far away.

This case is kind of unsettling to me. What really happened to her body? Was it cremated? Had a hospital or morgue worker done something to it? And why was she decapitated? Where is the rest of her skeleton? SO MANY QUESTIONS I hope can be resolved soon.

It's one thing she died naturally, but what happened to her after the fact only confuses and creeps me out. I really do hope there will be explanations for this, because by her only photo, Alyce just seems like an innocent, normal elderly woman who just passed. She had a family who had her (alleged) ashes for all this time, only to find out this actually just happened to her. Freaky.

Huge thanks for the DNA Doe Project and other genetic genealogists who assisted in giving this woman her name back. Rest in peace, Alyce Peterson, loved by your family.

SOURCES AND FURTHER READING

Unidentified Wiki

DNA Doe Project

Doe Network

Clark Perry Baldwin and The Murders of Cindi Estrada & Irene Vasquez

WARNING: This post involves details of rape and violent murder. Viewer discretion advised!

Estimated reading time: About 6 minutes

Reconstructions by Carl Koppelman; left: Bitter Creek Betty (Irene Vasquez), right: Sheridan County Jane Doe (Cindi Estrada)

Hey everyone! Today I found out about the identification of Sheridan County Jane Doe, and I was absolutely amazed. Because of Cindi's identification, I would like to discuss her case, alongside her killer's other victim, who was also identified this year.

The Great Basin Murders

The Great Basin Murders is the general name for a series of killings committed from 1983 - 1997 made across Wyoming, Utah, Nevada, and Idaho. 

The modus operandi of the Great Basin killer(s) was to rape teenage or young adult women who were pregnant or parents, then murder them by strangulation, stabbing, shooting, or some combination. Their bodies would then be left in wooded areas. At least 9 women are suspected to be victims of this.

It's suspected there were multiple Great Basin killers during the period, and there have been multiple suspects. For more information on the many other victims, visit the Wikipedia article I link at the end. As suggested by the title, the suspect I'll discuss is Clark Perry Baldwin, but before we can, we have to delve into his victims.

Bitter Creek Betty

On March 1st, 1992, a truck driver found the frozen and mummified corpse of a young woman, near Bitter Creek in Streewater County, Wyoming. It was estimated her body had been left there for at least a month and no more than four months. She was about 24 to 32 years old, and had a unique rose tattoo on her right breast.

Original sketch and reconstruction of her tattoo.

To view the victim's post-mortem tattoo, click here.

Other characteristics of her included her long, dark wavy brown hair, a gold ring, and a golden necklace. Her pink panties and pants were recovered. Sadly, the victim also had C-section scar, meaning she could have been a mother.

Her death was very violent. It's unclear what exactly killed her, but it is known she had been raped, beaten, and strangled, along with having her face being stabbed with an ice pick. Her face was severely damaged by trauma.

Reconstructions by Charles E. Holt (left) and Wesley Neville (right).

With such a violent death, police began investigating for leads for the victim known as Bitter Creek Betty, but there weren't many...at least for now.

(Side note: I have to warn, you can easily find an edited PM photo of her by searching up her name, with what appears to be eyes pasted on her face. I will not link to it as it depicts a pained mouth and unsettling eyes, and I think it would be too distasteful.)

Sheridan County Jane Doe

Now I can discuss the case I began this post with- SCJD. For some reason she isn't listed as an official victim of the 9th Great Basin victims, but I believe she is for reasons we'll explain soon.

On April 13th, 1992, about a month after Betty's body was discovered, the decomposing body of a young adult woman alongside Interstate 90 was found. Her official cause of death is undetermined, but it is generally listed as homicide by beating. She also had been severely sexually assaulted.

Like Betty, SCJD was sadly pregnant at the time of her death, and it appeared she had a history of childbirth. She was estimated to be about 16 to 21 years old, younger than Betty. She had tinted brown hair and wore a checkered blue and white midriff shirt.

Reconstructions of SCJD.

Shirt upon discovery

Original reconstructions of SCJD.

The DNA Connections

The cases of Bitter Creek Betty and Sheridan County Jane Doe initially seemed unrelated to each other. That was until 2014, when seminal fluid left behind when Betty was raped was tested for DNA. A genetic profile of her killer was built, and it matched DNA left behind at the crime scene of SCJD, suggesting they had been killed by the same person.

The DNA also matched the semen found on another murdered woman, named Pamela McCall, pregnant at the time of her death. Her body was found and shortly identified on March 10th, 1992, around the time of Betty & SCJD. Like all the victims, she had been sexually assaulted, and then strangled.

 

Pamela McCall

In 2020, another DNA examination proved the DNA found at both scenes belonged to 59-year-old truck driver Clark Perry Baldwin, who would've been about 31 at the time of the murders.

Clark Perry Baldwin upon arrest.

It was discovered Baldwin had already had a criminal history related to sexual abuse. In February 1991 (a month before the murders), he was arrested for assaulting a hitchhiker from Kansas in Wheeler County, Texas. He held her at gunpoint then struck her over the head. He hogtied and raped her before attempting to strangle his victim. Thankfully, she managed to escape. Baldwin confessed, "but the charge was dismissed due to failure to prosecute".

Due to his DNA being connected, he was arrested for the murders in 2020. His ex-wife then said he had mentioned murdering a girl in the 1990s and chucking her body out of his truck. It's possible this was SCJD.

Baldwin is also a suspect in another murder- Rhonda Knutson, who was found severely beaten to death near a truck stop in Williamstown, albeit not sexually assaulted like the other victims. Baldwin was living near the area at the time. He became a suspect after a witness described men who walked with Rhonda shortly before her death, and Baldwin looked similar to one of the sketches. He hasn't said anything about murdering Knutson.

Identifications & Current Case Status

In 2022, using genetic genealogy, Bitter Creek Betty and Sheridan County Jane Doe were identified. Their NamUs pages were removed and their Doe Network page said they were identified. However, no official announcement about their names was released, so it was still kind of limbo.

Thankfully, as of 2025, Betty and SCJD got the further dignity of having their names annouced. In May of 2025, Bitter Creek Betty was publicly identified as Irene Vasquez, aged 24. Her half-sister had last heard from her in 1990.

As I mentioned earlier, a few days ago, Sheridan County Jane Doe was publicly identified as Cindi Arleen Estrada, aged 21, who lived in California. Someone reports finding a possible yearbook photo of Cindi, but it is unverified. I may update this if it is confirmed to be Cindi.

After 3 decades, Irene and Cindi were finally home.

Unfortunately, as of writing, on July 18th...Clark Perry Baldwin actually died before he could be tried for the murders. He had suffered a heart attack. While it is for sure Baldwin murdered Irene, Cindi, and Pamela, whatever other secrets he had about the murders he took to the grave. How frustrating.

Despite this, I'm glad Irene and Cindi have since been publically identified, and their murders have been solved. It is unconfirmed if Baldwin was involved in the other Great Basin murders, but there is a bittersweet ending to have Irene and Cindi given justice and dignity after suffering such morbid deaths.

Rest in peace Irene Vasquez and Cindi Estrada, and the rest of the victims.

SOURCES & FURTHER READING:

Morbidology

Wikipedia

r/gratefuldoe (Cindi Estrada)

r/gratefuldoe (Irene Vasquez) (POSTMORTEM WARNING)

Unidentified Wiki (Cindi Estrada)

Unidentified Wiki (Irene Vasquez)

Doe Network (Cindi Estrada)

Doe Network (Irene Vasquez) (POSTMORTEM WARNING)

CowBoy State Daily (POSTMORTEM WARNING)

CowBoy State Daily (POSTMORTEM WARNING)